Old Ideas and New Directions

 I’ve been in ministry now of some sort or another for over 20 years, lead pastor for about 13.  For many of those years, I’ve known the world was different than what I was prepared to deal with.  The majority of churches and pastors in the US seem to be well equipped to pastor churches in communities which are predominantly Christian, and have a positive view of both Jesus and His followers. 

 But what if this isn’t the case?  What if the world around us isn’t Christian?  What if their view of Jesus is largely negative because their perception of Jesus followers is, well, let’s say unenthusiastic?  What if the way we are doing church works for some, but not for many?  And what if that many is growing more and more each day? 

 This was a question I was struck with about 10 years ago, and have been struggling with since.  I know we are often told that churches should be hospitals for the sick, should be outposts for those seeking Jesus.  The problem is, this was often stated in such a way that we were supposed to be a place those who wanted Jesus could attend and find him.  This assumes something which just isn’t true: the sick, the sinner, will come.  Most people who don’t know Jesus want very little to do with traditional church.

 Now, throughout this journey I have made these claims, all the while stating that the traditional church is still a necessary part of the American life.  As long as there are people who will seek Christ through these venues, we need to make them available.  I don’t see that changing anytime in the next generation or two. 

 My growing concern, though, was that we were putting all of our energy, training, and resources to provide these types of environments, but very little effort into going out into the world where those who needed Jesus the most already were.  Sure, we were trying new ways of doing church, but the majority of these changes were minor in the larger scope of things.  Different music, more comfortable seating, screens with visuals, better preaching…you get it.  In other words, we were doing our best to create a better place for people to come.  Even when we did outreaches, the assumption was largely that outreach was only deemed successful if people who we reached out to eventually came to church.  I know, because as a pastor, I’ve heard the same questions over and over after getting out into the community: “Did you see anyone come to church from that?” 

 My point is not to say that these things were wrong, but more and more my concern is that this is our definition of church.  Even if we love the phrase, “Church is not a building, it’s people!”, there is still the assumption that those people meet at a building, which we conveniently call the church.  And when we invite people to church, it’s to that same building. 

 Now, back to my story.  This is nothing new to me.  But as I examined my own gifts and training, I made assumptions of my own.  God wanted me to continue to work with the traditional church to try to create spaces for people who felt the way I did to move out and do these things.  The problem is I was only making the problem worse, and was growing restless while doing it.  What was I supposed to do? 

 Well, I quit.  To be fair, there were many reasons I stepped away from my role as pastor of a traditional church.  But maybe, just maybe, God was using all of those things to push me into something new, something different.  Something I’ve been aching to be part of for a decade now.  Maybe I’m not supposed to support others doing something different, but instead partner with them and push out into a world that wants Jesus, but doesn’t know quite what that means or where to find what they’re hungering for. 

 I don’t know.  Maybe. 

 These days, I’m in an “in-between” place in my life.  I’m working in the real world these days, which is vastly different than what I’ve gotten used to.  And I’m reading, praying, having conversations.  And getting some direction.  It’s not all clear yet, and it’s making me nervous.  But that’s okay. 

 During this time, God continues to speak to me, to teach me things, to show me new ways of experiencing His Presence.  It’s been good.  In some ways, better than it’s been in many years.  In other ways, though, I’m getting restless.  And it is in this restlessness that I’m striving to find my rest in God. 

 More to come, I suppose. 

The Sin God Doesn’t Forgive

 

I’ve been reading through the Pentateuch (the first five books of the Old Testament) in my reading time lately.  One story in these books that confuses and disturbs some is the story of Moses striking the rock.  Perhaps you are familiar.  The Israelites are complaining.  Again.  This time it is because of thirst.  Where is the provision God promised?  Where is the water? 

 

Moses approaches God, seeking help.  God gives him the following instructions: “Take the staff, and assemble the congregation, you and Aaron your brother, and tell the rock before their eyes to yield its water.” (Numbers 20:8a)  Moses proceeds to go out among the people, and instead of speaking to the rock, Moses strikes it.  For this, God tells Moses that he won’t enter the Promised Land. 

 

Some interesting points of context.  Moses has been leading the people for decades, and their complaining had no doubt worn him down.  In addition, his sister had just died.  Moses probably wasn’t in the best place emotionally.  Why was God so harsh?  I can’t imagine I would have acted any better.

 

One thing we can see in the story is that Moses seemed to want to take some credit for the miracle.  “Hear now, you rebels: shall we bring water for you out of this rock?”  We?  Was Moses the miracle worker?  It seems, in his moment of emotionally vulnerability, that Moses let slip something previously unstated: he and God were working together to lead the people.  Pride, a sin wrecking people since Cain and Abel, was messing Moses up. 

 

Still, though, why didn’t God forgive him?  Moses had done so much for God, for the Hebrew people.  Why would God have taken away from Moses something which Moses had sacrificed so much to achieve.  Why was this sin so egregious? 

 

Consider this for a minute: God had, many times, proclaimed such judgements against the Hebrews.  They would be destroyed for their disobedience.  They would never enter into the Promised Land.  Each time, Moses intercedes for them, and God relents.  There is a pattern in the books of Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy. 

 

1. Sin
2. Proclamation of judgement
3. Intercession
4. Withholding of judgement

 

So, what’s going on here?  Why is there no withholding of judgement in the life of Moses?  As God says to him in Numbers 20, Moses never enters into the Promised Land.  The answer seems to be that there is something in Moses’ sin which God can’t forgive.  Is it pride?  Certainly, God has forgiven people for their pride many times over.  Was it because Moses took credit for the miracle?  Again, this isn’t a unique sin, and God does indeed forgive this sort of thing in Scriptures. 

 

The answer, I believe, is found in Deuteronomy 4.  The people are getting ready to enter into the Promised Land, and Moses has some final words for them.  Some sermons.  This is essentially what the entire book of Deuteronomy is, after all.  It’s Moses’ sermons to the people.  Moses giving them some final word.  Thirty-three chapters of final words.  It’s a lot. 

 

Anyway, in Deuteronomy 4:21, Moses says this: “The LORD was angry with me because of you, and he swore that I should not cross the Jordan, and that I should not enter the good land that the LORD your God is giving you for an inheritance.”  Did you pick up on the point I’m trying to make?  Moses tells the people that it is their sin which has caused God to refuse him entrance into the Promised Land.  “The LORD was angry with me because of you.” 

 

For reference, let’s look at exactly what God tells Moses.  “Because you did not believe in me, to uphold me as holy in the eyes of the people of Israel, therefore you shall not bring this assembly into the land that I have given them.”  Whose sin was keeping Moses out of the Promised Land?  It wasn’t their sin; it was his.  I’m sure this irked Moses.  I’m guessing it really ate at him.  Which is why, a little while later, he blames the people for his sin.

 

Certainly, anger was a factor in Moses’ sin.  Some would even call it righteous anger.  The people, after all, were complaining against God again.  Didn’t Moses have a right to be angry?  Apparently not.  More importantly, Moses blamed others for his sin, and because he blamed, he never confessed, never interceded for his own sins. 

 

Remember the pattern from before? 

1. Sin
2. Proclamation of judgement
3. Intercession
4. Withholding of judgement 

The pattern has changed.  

1. Sin
2. Proclamation of judgement
3. Blame
4. Judgement remains 

Would God have forgiven Moses if he confessed?  We have every reason to believe He would have.  He forgave time and time again.  Many of those sins would be considered far worse than Moses’ sin.  Instead of confession, though, Moses blames.  Because of this, Moses’ judgement remains. 

 

The application is, for me, one of big lessons we should take away from the lessons in Scripture.  God wants to forgive our sin.  He “is not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance” (II Peter 3:9).  The only thing which keeps back forgiveness is sin which we blame on others.  We love to blame others for our sins.  Our anger, which we might even call righteous, keeps us from true confession.  It’s easier on the conscience is we can find someone else to point the finger at.  The problem is, this keeps us from God.  In refusing to acknowledge our sin, we have decided to push away the God who died to forgive us. 

 

John puts it this way in his first letter: If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.  If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.”  (I John 1:8-10)